


First Times

by jlshadowstar



Category: DRAMAtical Murder (Visual Novel), DRAMAtical Murder - All Media Types
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-15
Updated: 2016-01-15
Packaged: 2018-05-14 02:16:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5725966
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jlshadowstar/pseuds/jlshadowstar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Aoba and Koujaku work their feelings out</p>
            </blockquote>





	First Times

Things have never felt more right than they do right now. I lay on the floor and feel the weight of my best friend pressed against my body. His tongue rolls easily against mine as I feel my mind get fuzzy. Heats pouring off of his body in waves and I feel his fingers tangle in my hair. If anyone else tried to touch my overly-sensitive hair; but with him it's different.  
“Aoba,” he whispers softly, the sound of his voice sending a shiver down my spine. How did we end up like this again? Oh yeah, it was after dinner. We had come up to my room as always....  
“Aoba, is something troubling you?”  
I looked at Koujaku with surprise at the question.  
“Why do you ask?” I asked him.   
“You seemed pretty out of it at dinner,” he told me, “I didn’t want to call it to attention in case it was something you didn’t feel comfortable discussing with Tae-san.”  
I was silent for a while, there was something but I wasn’t sure telling him was the best option. Lately I had been having weird thoughts about Koujaku. Whenever I’d think about him I’d get aroused; whenever I was near him my heartbeat would go crazy. I couldn’t figure out why these things were happening, but the last thing I wanted to do was tell him about it. God that would be embarrassing. His red eyes watched me carefully, waiting for a response.   
“Er, well, I’ve just been thinking about stuff,” I told him, trying to think of some bullshit reason why I’ve been so weird.  
“What kind of stuff?” he asked me and I felt heat flood my face. Koujaku took notice to my reaction and moved closer to me.   
“Seriously,” he continued, “You can tell me.”  
I opened my mouth to answer but couldn’t bring myself to say the words. How did you even tell someone something like this? I glanced over the distance between us; even Ren wouldn’t have fit in the space between us anymore. My heart felt like it was gonna burst out of my chest and I noticed I was starting to get hard. I needed to get some distance between us. Slowly so he wouldn’t notice; I started to move away a bit. Koujaku sighed and caught my wrist before I got too far.  
“If I did something to annoy you, I wish you’d just tell me,” he said.  
“What?” I responded, unsure of how he got to that conclusion.  
“That’s what this is about, isn’t it?” he asked. His grip on my wrist tightened, causing me to squirm a bit.  
“No,” I said weakly, unsure of how to react or what to say, “That’s not it.”  
“Then what is it? Why are you trying so hard to get away from me?”  
I didn’t speak. I didn’t move. I didn’t know what to do. What should I say? How can I fix this?  
“Uh, well, you see,” I stammered. I couldn’t even focus enough to gather my thoughts. This is a complete disaster. Tears started to fill my eyes and I looked away.  
“Whats wrong? he asked me, concern filling his eyes at the sudden development.  
“I’m sorry,” I told him as the tears started to roll down my face, “I’m just so confused, I don’t know what to do.”  
“Confused? Aoba, you need to calm down,” he told me, “I can’t understand what you’re trying to tell me if you get worked up like this.”  
I took a few deep breaths and wiped my eyes. I was pretty far from calm, but I had to at least relax enough to talk to Koujaku. After a few minutes of silence, Koujaku spoke again.  
“Ok, now I want you to talk to me,” he told me. “What have you been confused about?”  
It felt like ice was filling my chest. Time seemed to come to a halt.  
“I....well,” I stammered, “I don’t know how to say this.”  
“Try,” he answered, “I’ll try to understand.”  
I took in a deep breath and struggled to find the words I was looking for. After I was sure I somewhat knew what to say, I answered.  
“I’ve been confused over feelings I’ve been having for you,” I told him, my face burning. My gaze fell to the ground. I couldn’t bring myself to look on him; what’s going through his head right now?  
“What kind of feelings?” Koujaku asked me and I felt my breath catch in my throat.  
“Does...does it really matter?” I responded. I’m so embarrassed I could die.  
“It does,” he tells me, “Are these feelings good?”  
“Yeah, well, I’m not sure,” I told him without looking up, “I’ve never felt like this before.”  
“Can you try describing what it feels like?”  
“Uh.. well, um, my heart beats fast. I mean really fast. It feels like it might burst. My head gets all fuzzy, oh and my stomach feels weird. I can’t really find a way to describe that feeling though.”  
Koujaku said nothing in response and my nerves spiked. Oh god, this is awful. He’s probably really freaked out by all this. I just know it. I steeled my nerves and shot a quick glance at Koujaku. I was surprised by what I saw. Koujaku’s face was colored a deep red; was he blushing?  
“Eh, Koujaku,” I said, trying to get a response from him.  
“Oh, sorry,” he said averting his gaze from mine, “It's just. Well, this is gonna sound weird, but you just described the feelings I get when I’m around you.”  
“Huh?” I said in response, unsure of how else to react.  
“Well, since we’re kinda already on the subject; I’ve had some pretty confusing feelings about you too. I wondered if you were experiencing them too but you didn’t seem to be acting any different so I ignored them.”  
So Koujaku had been having these weird feelings too. I never would’ve guessed. He hid it really well.  
“How long?” Koujaku said out of nowhere.  
“What?” I answered.  
“How long have you been feeling like this?”   
“Uh,” I said, thinking back, “A few months now.”  
“You hid it well until now,” he told me.  
“What about you?” I ask.  
“Mm?”  
“How long have you felt this?”   
“I don’t know, a year at least.”  
Koujaku’s words floored me. He managed to hide this for a year?! How the hell did he not go crazy? Silence filled the room. Neither of us really knew what to say to the other now that everything was out in the open. I needed to break the tension somehow.  
“So, uh,” I said and Koujaku looked at me.  
“What is it?” he asked.  
“What do we do now?” I responded.  
“That’s a tough question,” he told me. “What do you want to do?”  
What do I want to do?  
“I don’t know,” I told him.  
“Do you want to explore these feelings?” Koujaku asked me as he moved closer.   
“Uh, well,” I stammered. My heart pounded and I tried to gather my thoughts. All I could think about was how close he was at the moment. Our knees were already touching.  
“Do you trust me?” Koujaku asks me.  
“Huh?” I said in response to being pulled from my muddled thoughts.  
“Do you trust me,” he repeated in a serious tone.  
“Of course,” I told him, offended that he’d even ask. We’ve known each other forever, I told him everything!  
“Then, I want to try something. Can I kiss you?”  
Heat flooded over my face at the question. Koujaku noticed my reaction and immediately spoke again.  
“It doesn’t have to go past that!” he clarified quickly, “I just thought that it might help us figure some stuff out. It's fine if you don’t want to.”  
At this point I was barely paying attention. All I could think about was Koujaku; my desire to know what these feelings were or how deeply they ran. I already knew what I wanted.  
“It’s fine,” I assured him, “You just surprised me is all. You can kiss me if you want.”  
“You’re sure?” he asked, trying to make sure I really wanted this.  
“Yeah.”  
Koujaku placed a hand on my cheek and his face moved closer to mine. I closed my eyes and felt something soft touch my lips.....

That’s what happened. That kiss started out light, but got deeper until we ended up making out on my bedroom floor. I don’t know how long we’ve been at this, but it's been long enough for a small pleasure to start to build in my hips. If we keep going like this...  
“Aoba,” Koujaku says softly, pulling away from the kiss.   
“What is it?” I ask, unsure if I had done something to upset him.  
“How far do you want this to go?” Koujaku asks me.  
“What do you mean?”  
“If we keep going like this, I won’t be able to hold back,” he tells me, “I don’t want to hurt you or force you into anything you don’t want. If you don’t want to take this further, we need to stop now.”  
I run my gaze over Koujaku and realize how much he’s already lost himself. His crimson eyes are clouded with desire and his face is red; on top of that he’s starting to breathe pretty heavy. But I should speak for myself, I can feel my dick hardening just from the two of us making out. Is it really ok for us to keep going though? We’ve been friends for years, this will change everything. I look at Koujaku again and I feel my heart swell. There’s no use fighting it; I already know what I want.  
“I don’t want to stop,” I tell him.   
“You’re sure,” he asks. “You really want this?”  
“I do,” I assure him, “Just let me make sure the door’s locked.”  
I don’t even want to think about the possibility of Granny coming in and seeing us like that. Koujaku lets me up and I walk to the door. I slide the lock and turn to see Koujaku looking at Ren’s bed. Ren’s curled up in it asleep with Beni asleep on his back.  
“Do you think they’ll wake up?” he asks me.  
“Ren won’t unless I touch him,” I answer, “But he’s an older model. Will Beni wake up?”  
“I don’t know,” he tells me, “I don’t think he will. Should I switch him off?”  
“And what do we tell him for a reason?” I ask, “I think our odds of being uninterrupted are better if you just leave him be.”  
Koujaku says nothing and we walk to sit on my bed.  
“And you’re positive you want this?” he asked me, “I don’t mean to bother you or make you think I don’t want to, because I do, I really do. But I don’t want you to end up regretting it later.”  
I place my hand on Koujaku’s and entwine our fingers.  
“I want you,” I assure him, “I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t nervous but it's ok. I trust you.”  
Koujaku presses his mouth against mine again. It starts light but soon deepens as his tongue explores my mouth. The feeling in my hips starts to build again as Koujaku pulls me closer to him. His hands slip under my shirt and brush over my stomach; he pulls away from our kiss and starts to kiss under my jawline. A small gasp escapes me and his hands move up my body; over my ribs and to my chest. Koujaku massages my nipples as he kisses down my neck; I grip the front of his kimono and bite my lip to keep small moans from escaping.  
He pulls my shirt off and pushes me back onto the bed. The cool sheets press against my warm skin sending a small chill down my spine. Koujaku kisses me again and my hands find their way into the separation of his kimono. I start to push it off his shoulders and he tenses up.  
“What’s wrong?” I ask.  
“It’s nothing,” he tells me, “Sorry.”  
“Don’t lie to me Koujaku,” I ask him, “You looked pretty freaked.”  
“Well,” Koujaku says as he shrugs his kimono off, “There’s no point in trying to hide it.”  
I look at Koujaku and see the full extent of the tattoo that peaks from under his kimono. The tribal tattoo extends over the right half of his chest and stomach, disappearing under his pant line; as well as over his right arm.  
“I already knew you had a tattoo,” I tell him.   
“I have three actually,” he responds, pushing his bangs out of his face to reveal a small matching tribal on the right side of his face framing his eye. Then he turns to show an intricate flower pattern up the left side of his back.  
“How come you never mentioned them before?” I ask.  
“I don’t like people seeing them,” he says as he turns to face me again.  
“Why not? They’re really cool.”  
“They remind me of-” Koujaku says before pausing, “Something I don’t want to remember.”  
“What happened?” I ask him.  
“Please Aoba,” he asks me, “Don’t make me say it now.”  
The look in his eyes is all I need to know on the subject. He doesn’t want to talk about it yet. Whatever it was must’ve been painful.  
“Ok, I’ll leave it alone for now,” I tell him, “But will you tell me some other time?”  
Koujaku stays silent for a minute before answering me.  
“Fine. It may take some time for me to be able to talk about it but for you I’ll do it. Someday I’ll tell you about it.”  
I can’t help but feel happy about that. But the look in Koujaku’s eyes still shows uncertainty. How can I cheer him up? My eyes run over the tattoos and I get an idea. I sit up and press a kiss against the tattoo on his face.  
“Aoba, what’re you-” Koujaku starts but I cut him off.  
“These tattoos are a source of painful memories for you, right?” I ask, moving lower to kiss the top of the tattoo on his front. “Then let me try to take those memories away, even for a little while.”  
“Aoba,” he says again unsure of this.  
“Just trust me,” I tell him as I kiss along the pattern on his chest. Koujaku says nothing more to protest, so I go a bit lower and press my lips against the design on his ribs. I hear him gasp as I reach the edge of his stomach and I start to pull on his pants. It doesn’t take me long to get them down enough for his cock to be exposed and I see the end of the tattoo in the middle of his hip. This must’ve been agony to get done; I don’t know how he did it. I stroke his cock slowly as I kiss down his abs. He tries to keep them down but I hear the occasional gasp or moan come from him. Those occasional sounds not only turn me on even more but also make me happy. Happy to know that he’s feeling pretty good right now. I reach the markings on his hip and as I kiss the edges of it; I start to move closer to his cock. Koujaku notices this and tries to stop me.  
“Aoba, you don’t have to-” he starts but is cut off as I take the tip of it in my mouth. A sharp moan escapes Koujaku at the feeling and I try to take more of him into my mouth. I flick the tip of it with my tongue and start to suck on him. I move head up and down at a steady pace. He still tries to hold his voice down but a steady stream of moans escape from Koujaku. I go at this pace for a while and I feel Koujaku place a hand on the top of my head.  
“Aoba,” he gasps, “You need to stop. If you keep going...”  
Realizing what he’s trying to tell me I stop. I take my mouth off of his dick and look up at him. Koujaku places a hand under my jaw and pulls me up for a quick kiss before pressing me back against the bed.  
“I’m taking control now,” he tells me, “Is that ok?”  
I nod and he unbuckles my belt. He slides my pants and underwear off and throws them off of the bed. Koujaku runs a hungry gaze over my body and I feel my face turn red again.  
“Open your legs for me,” he tells me. My face grows even hotter at the embarrassing command but I do as he says. His lust-filled gaze rakes over the lower half of my body and I look away.  
“You’re pretty shy all of a sudden,” he points out at my reaction, “What’s wrong?”  
“Nothing,” I tell him, “It’s just the way you’re looking at me.”  
“Sorry,” he says, “I can’t help it. You just look so damn beautiful.”  
I say nothing in response, why does he have to say crap like that now? I feel Koujaku press against my thigh before settling between my legs.  
“I’m gonna get you ready now,” he tells me, “It may hurt a bit so just try to relax.”  
I feel Koujaku press a finger against my entrance and push in. It doesn’t hurt but it definitely feels weird. He moves slowly at first, twisting and curling inside of me. Once he’s sure I’m used to it, he adds another. A whimper escapes me at the feeling of being stretched, there’s a weak pain at the addition.  
“I know, it’s ok,” he assures me, as he moves the two fingers in a scissoring motion. I grip the sheets lightly and try not to focus on the pain. Koujaku gently strokes my cock to try and distract me from it. Weak pleasure starts to wash over me and soon enough I don’t even notice Koujaku’s fingers. He adds a third one and I cover my mouth with the back of my hand to keep from crying out. Pain cuts through the pleasure and I squeeze my eyes shut to keep tears from spilling out. Koujaku starts to jack me off a little faster as he moves the three fingers in time. Pain and pleasure blend together and soon I can’t tell the difference. Everything starts to feel good and the feeling in my hips starts to cause a small pressure. Feeling that I’m stretched out, Koujaku removes his fingers. I feel a loss at the absence of his fingers and Koujaku moves up my body. He lines himself up at my entrance and pushes in.  
Tears spring into my eyes as I feel Koujaku enter me. It hurts, it hurts a lot. I look away, not wanting him to see my reaction.  
“Aoba, look at me,” he tells me and I glance up at him. Koujaku presses a soft kiss against my forehead before meeting my gaze; concern clouding his lust-filled eyes.  
“Are you okay?” he asks me.  
“Yeah,” I say weakly.  
“Does it hurt?”  
“A bit,” I tell him, not wanting him to worry, “It’s fine. It’ll pass.”  
“You’re sure?”   
“Yeah.”  
“I’m gonna move, let me know if it's too much.”  
Koujaku pulls halfway out before pushing back into me. I gasp as pain shoots through me again, unsure if I’ll be able to do this. Koujaku sets a slow pace; I can tell he’s trying to be gentle about it but it's not helping. I feel Koujaku’s hand find it's way to my cock and he starts to stroke me in time with his thrusts. Pleasure starts to mix with the pain as I start to get used to Koujaku’s movements. Weak moans escape me as the pain starts to fade completely.  
“Ah....Koujaku....” I moan and Koujaku speeds up a little. A well placed thrust from Koujaku sends pleasure shooting through my body.  
“Ah!” I cry out. Koujaku notices my reaction and focuses his movements on that spot. In a short time, he has me gasping, panting and moaning from the pleasure. Sweat glistens on both of our bodies; I grip the sheets in an effort to find my senses; I’ve never felt like this before. Koujaku starts to kiss my neck as he starts to fuck me harder.  
“Koujaku! Ah...hah, mm. Ah!”   
“Aoba,” he gasps out, his breath hot against my skin. “Does it feel good?”  
“Hah, yes....it...feels, ah!”  
I can’t even get the words to tell him how good I feel out. The pressure in my hips is driving me crazy; I’m not sure how much longer I’m gonna last at this rate. Koujaku must be feeling the same way; because his movements get more erratic. He’s still keeping an eye on me to make sure he isn’t hurting me but he’s gotten a lot rougher. If it was his goal to make a sweating, panting mess out of me; he succeeded. I can feel myself coming completely undone as Koujaku keeps ravishing me. Harder. Faster. Deeper. There’s not a part of me that doesn’t feel good right now; the pressure is unbearable now. I won’t last much longer.  
“Ah, Koujaku. Mmm....I’m..gonna, ah!”   
I don’t even finish speaking when I reach my climax. Pleasure tears through me as I come all over Koujaku’s hand and stomach. Koujaku thrusts into me hard a few times and I hear his breath hitch; then something hot splashes inside me. Koujaku presses a sloppy kiss against my mouth as both of us recover from our orgasms. After a moment, he pulls out of me and lays down next to me. Silence passes through the room for a while before Koujaku speaks.  
“So, uh,” he says carefully.  
“What is it,” I ask.  
“What exactly are we now?”  
Thats a good question.  
“I don’t know,” I tell him, “But, I want to explore these feelings more. You know, if it’s ok with you.”  
Koujaku smiles and places a hand over mine, “I’d like that too.”  
“So,” I say, “Does this mean we’re, well, together?”  
“I guess it does.”  
“Should we, should we tell people?”  
“There’s no reason to rush, we’re still trying to figure things out. Why don’t we wait til we’re a little more sure of each other.”  
“Ok.”  
We say nothing for a while and I move closer to Koujaku. He throws an arm around me and exhaustion crashes over me. My eyes close and I hear Koujaku let out a quiet chuckle before I feel him press a kiss to my cheek.  
“Good night, Aoba.”


End file.
